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It’s Not What You Say, But The Way That You Say It

http://donnamerrilltribe.comI don’t really know where this came from. Somebody told me it was an old song. Not sure. I do remember one of my old college professors using this line, though, to impress on us the power of communication.

It’s not so important what you say.

What’s more important is the way that you say it.

That’s what will impress people.

I have a dog that just loves to sit on your lap… all the time.

When I sit on the couch and have a little snack, he’s right there.

I tell him “No… Get Down” as he watches and prays for a crumb to fall.

He gets the message, and he gets down.

Usually, he runs right over to the other couch where my husband, David, is having the same snack. He jumps right in his lap and starts getting cozy and friendly.

David tells him “No… Get Down.”

But he has a whole different tone, as he pets and hugs the little thief.

Predictably, the dog just stays on his lap and gets even cuter.

It doesn’t really matter how many times David tells him to get down, he knows it’s not serious. He can tell by the tone and the delivery.

We argue about this, but I can promise you this… it’s not “what you say.”

The words mean very little. It’s the underlying message that’s being communicated.

Bloggers Beware

Keep this little story in mind, bloggers, when you’re trying to make a point, teach a lesson or convince your visitors of something.

It’s not “what you say.”

So, what are the ways you can say it for utmost impact?

Well, there are many.

It gets down to this… how do you like to communicate your message?

I like to call people who come to my blog “visitors” rather than “readers.”

Did you ever notice that most bloggers talk about writing things for their readers?

I think this sort of limits your perception of what you can do on your blog in order to communicate.

You can be a writer and communicate in that way, but while that’s probably the most common blogging method, there are so many others.

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Are you a writer?

I guess when people think of blogging, they usually think a blog is something that needs to be written.

I’ve had people tell me that they don’t think they can blog because they’re not good writers.

Did you know you don’t have to be a great writer to write great blog posts?

People want to know about your perspective on things. They want your feedback on why you liked a movie, if you took a cool Udemy course, or how you improved your bowling game. These sorts of things don’t require great writing skills.

You just need to be honest and sincere, and be eager to share something with your readers. That’s why people like to visit blogs. They get to know bloggers, and be part of their enthusiasm for a topic.

You might think of simply writing a letter to your brother or friend. How would you write it?

Would you try to be a perfectionist, or write the most amazing thing on a topic of incredible importance? Probably not.

You’re just writing to share something worthwhile.  You want to do it convincingly and in a manner that your reader can get a sense of your feelings about it.

But writing is only one method of communicating.

Do you do video?

You can also post an entry to your blog that just a video. Sure, you’ll need to write some introduction and summary to the topic of the video, probably. But, essentially, you’re communicating with your visitor through video, not an essay or article.

Do you have a good voice?

You might think of delivering your content through audio tracks, like mp3 links or podcasts. You could get real creative, even artistic.   I know some people who are very entertaining with their audios and podcasts.   Some are funny, some dramatic, some instructive.

Pick your style, but whatever style you use, audio is a great way to say what’s on your mind.

Don’t limit yourself.

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You could even deliver content in the form of music.

How about doing a voice-over, where you simply talk while shooting a video of something like a dog running or people walking down the street or whatever suits your topic?

Are you artistic?

You can write blog posts that feature mostly images.

These can be photos you shoot from you mobile phone, or pictures you created with PicMonkey, Canva or some other online tool.

You can snag images while you’re browsing the net, and use them in your posts.

You can make infographics that take people through a visual journey of something you want to related to them.

Variety

These are just a few examples of different ways to say what you want to communicate on your blog.

I suggest you focus on using the method that comes most naturally to you. Work on delivering your message through your strength.

After you’ve gotten really good at doing that, you can play with some of the other methods to add variety to your blog posts.

You might even consider having guest posts done by people who use different types of methods than you do, so your visitors are exposed to some fresh approaches.

Try to use novel approaches, but remember… while “the way that you say it” should be unique to you, “what you say” almost never will be.

You see, so many people try to create a blog or an article about something “new” that nobody’s ever heard of.

Unless you’re posting about a new software or a movie in production, you’re not likely to be the first person to ever blog about whatever you want to blog about.

But that’s okay.

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There’s really nothing new under the sun, so remember, “it’s not what you say.”

The way you present the topic is totally your own creation, in your words, with your own mood, insight or excitement.

That comes across through “the way that you say it.”

That’s the real challenge for bloggers. Being unique and inspiring not for “what you say,” but because of “the way that you say it.”

So…

What’s your favorite method of communicating your message?

What are some methods you’d like to explore?

Please give me your comments below, and share this article to folks who might find it useful.

-Donna

Donna Merrill
Donna is a well known blogger and creator of "Blogging Magic" - an intensive guide to blogging. "Blogging Magic" is for beginners who are trying to figure out how to bring their blogs to life with tons of visits, comments and social media interaction. It's even for advanced bloggers looking to reach new levels of authority and engagement with their audience.

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85 Responses to It’s Not What You Say, But The Way That You Say It

  1. Sherman Smith September 28, 2015 at 12:01 pm #

    Hey Donna,

    This is very true in every sense.

    As I was reading I was thinking about why some people attract more people to them with a minimum vocabulary verses those with a big vocabulary do not.

    It all has to deal with the tone you use and how you communicate with people. Even if you do have a big vocabulary it’s all about being on the same page as peopke and being likeable.

    Context, attitude and words compliment each other in one form or another. This will determine if you’re communication is either going to attract or repel people in general.

    So one rule of thumb is to communicate with those the same way you want people to communicate with you which is something I make an effort to do!

    Thanks for the share Donna! I hope you had a fantastic weekend!
    Sherman Smith recently posted..9 Ways To Not Waste Your Time BloggingMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 28, 2015 at 2:20 pm #

      Hi Sherman,

      Communication is so important for us to be aware of. Everything we write, do or say is either an effective way to do so or can just turn people off. Of course, we do have to be ourselves, but need to be aware of exactly what you have mentioned in your comment.

      Your rule of thumb is to communicate with those the same way you want people to communicate with you – Priceless! And you do communicate so well. I am an avid reader of your blog and you not only give out amazing content, but do so in a way that is open and appropriate to all.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  2. Adrienne
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 12:32 pm #

    Hey Donna,

    I can definitely relate to the tone you speak to your dogs. Let’s face it, when you’re more stern and put out that energy where they know you mean business then they’re going to listen to you and obey. If they’re like David and so many other people I know, they aren’t really serious about what they’re asking them to do and they know it. That was a great example and I hope David reads this comment too! LOL!!!

    I do call my audience readers most of the time. I also call them friends, commenters, you name it. What I do try to do though is call each one by their name so that they’ll feel much more welcome in the comments but I see your point. It’s how we make them feel and it is what we say.

    I agree that blogging doesn’t just have to be the written word but it does have to get across what it is you want to share. I just wish everyone would be much more relaxed and just share their experience. Over time they’ll get better whether they’re writing them, doing videos or audios. I think these things just take time but when we can relate to what they’re sharing then we’re going to start feeling that connections and that’s what you really want to achieve.

    More great advice for your visitors Donna. 😉

    Thank you for this and I’ll be sure to share this post as well. More people need to hear this message.

    Enjoy your week.

    ~Adrienne
    Adrienne recently posted..Magical Monday: Storytelling, Comments, Marketing, Relationships, ScholarshipMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 28, 2015 at 2:24 pm #

      Hi Adrienne,

      Oh yes..David is aware..he helped me edit this post lol. His response was “Who Me?” he he he
      I just shake my head when the dogs take control of him. But they do know they can’t get away with that with me. The other night David was at his computer and my hound wanted his treat. I told David to continue and ignore him…but no….that hound climbed up on his shoulders all 50 pounds of him. Ha!

      It is so true that we just have to relax and communicate the best we can. That is the key Adrienne. I know your “commenters” are your friends…most of them. You do call them or get in touch via social media.

      The best you mentioned is answer them by name. It is so easy and I just don’t know why some people don’t do that.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  3. Harleena Singh
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 12:52 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    So good to be back to blogging after a while :)

    Loved the post and the message it carries. You are so right there, it’s the way we say things that matter.

    Just like your dog you mentioned, ours too understands the tone and would listen to the stern one at times and take the rest of us for granted. They don’t understand what we say, it’s the tone and way it’s said.

    Oh yes – you don’t have to be a writer to be a blogger, they are way different! I think if you have the power of expressing yourself and know the basics, you can become a blogger easily.

    You’re right about the audio-video part, and let me add again, you’re doing so well on Periscope as even though I wasn’t around the blogosphere much, I did those!

    All in all, just be you and say what you have to because how you say it is what matters.

    Thanks for sharing this lovely message with us. Have a nice week ahead :)
    Harleena Singh recently posted..Do You Focus on the Guaranteed Past or FutureMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 28, 2015 at 2:29 pm #

      Hi Harleena,

      So good to see you back.

      When it comes to blogging, there are writers, podcasts and videos or “vlogging” as they call it. We can express ourselves in so many ways. We don’t have to be a professional at anything. Just do it!

      As part of my business plan, there is blogging and marketing. One of the marketing aspects was to focus on my list building every day. I decided to do a video a day and the Periscope came along just as I was doing that.

      I cannot tell you how much this has changed the course of my business. I scope once a day and am reaching a very wide audience. Already it is working for my business. Guess I have the gift of gab lol.

      Thanks so much for your input here and it is so great to have you back.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  4. Don Purdum
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 12:59 pm #

    HI Donna,

    WOW! This is a powerful article and it’s so true.

    I resonate with your story about your little “thief”, lol… Nicole and I spent years training our Corgi’s for show and obedience show and what you wrote is the very first thing we learned. It’s how you communicate and knowing what the dog needs to hear in order to respond.

    I really think that is one of the main points I got from your article. It’s not just what we say, but what do our “visitors” need to hear?

    That is really powerful as is our choice of words. I honestly never really thought about the difference between a “reader” and a “visitor” until you brought it up but that does have a subconscious element to it that can be the difference between a positive and negative tone / experience.

    I appreciate your wisdom and insights Donna!

    I hope you have a fantastic week.

    ~ Don Purdum
    Don Purdum recently posted..Why I’m Simplifying the Presentation of My MessageMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 28, 2015 at 2:51 pm #

      Hi Don,

      A good dog story does go a long way lol. I’m sure you learned a lot training corgi’s and can apply that in your daily life with people. Our tone, our presence, every thing we do or say has an effect on others.

      When it comes to our business, we have to keep all of that in mind. Yes, it does hit that subconscious level. Although we need to be ourselves and Never Fake It, our message has to be one that is heard from our readers.

      In the Marketing arena, there are so many folks telling us what to do. I don’t like to be told to do something, so I leave. But on the other hand, if a marketer has an altruistic message (the “true in that word always gets me!) I am inclined to listen.

      Have a wonderful week ahead.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  5. Marquita Herald
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 1:06 pm #

    Love your no-one-size-fits-all message Donna! The ever present advice to be “authentic” is really all about finding your own voice and having the guts to be true to yourself. And I think that’s important beyond the basics of communicating with your audience.

    When it comes to communicating with people, regardless of the how or the why of it, there are going to be those who don’t get it, don’t like it, or are firmly convinced we are clueless. The more confident we are in our message and delivery, the easier it is to keep things like this in perspective and focus on the things that truly matter. Thanks so for the inspiration!
    Marquita Herald recently posted..Why Do We Always Do it This Way?My Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 28, 2015 at 4:04 pm #

      Hi Marquita,

      You have raised an important issue. We do have to know our own voice and who we are and have the guts to do so. Once we are confident, we can go off and communicate any way we want to.

      Indeed, there will be those who like it and those who won’t. It takes confidence when we are communicating and we need to use our strong points. If writing is it…go with it, or maybe podcasting. Whatever it is, when we are confident about ourselves, our communication is more effective.

      Thanks for bringing up this topic.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  6. Sylviane Nuccio
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 1:15 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    First off, I liked your little story with your dog and husband, I can very vividly imagine the scene because I know both of you enough for that :)

    I am someone guilty of what you’re saying here. I refer people who visit my blog as my readers, but it must be because what I do most is write, and even when I post a video there’s still a lot of writing going on.

    By the way, I wanted to ask you if it’s possible to do a periscope with two people in two different places? I wanted to ask you this because I would love for you to be with me when I try this thing out. Just something I wanted to through out there. A good opportunity to do something different than writing for me.

    As you’re saying they are so many different ways of publishing content, and true one doesn’t need to be a great writer to have a blog, for sure.

    Have a great rest of the day!
    Sylviane Nuccio recently posted..Why You Should Hire A Content Manager If You Can’t Do It Well YourselfMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 28, 2015 at 4:10 pm #

      Hi Sylviane,

      I’m sure you have a vivid picture in your mind of me and David lol. As a writer, indeed you would refer to your visitors as readers.

      There are so many ways to push our content out. I like to write a blog, do a short video, and now with Periscope…I’m pretty busy lol.

      To answer your question: No Periscope doesn’t have that available yet, but I’m sure they are working on it. However, it is pretty easy to do because it is intuitive. Just download it on your phone, Give it a title, and hashtag it. Then start your broadcast. It is pretty scary at first because you won’t be familiar with it.

      I can tell you this…most people start by saying “test” or “this is my first broadcast” They make plenty of mistakes and I find it intriguing because they are the leaders in this niche that have the guts to try it out. Others see what they are doing and it encourages them.

      If you need to talk about it let me know. We can meet on Skype and I’ll walk you through.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  7. Brenda Lee
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 1:40 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    What a great post! I, like Adrienne, can totally relate with the dog talk. We’ve had ZueZue now for 2.5 months and trust me when I say, when I use that “certain tone” with her, she knows I mean business. Titan has long learned that but at times, he still pushes my buttons. :)

    I like to think I communicate well with my readers, my online friends, and my real-time friends. I try to be as personable as I can be and not condescending in any way.

    There are some bloggers out there that truly need to read this so I’m passing it along.

    Happy Monday!

    B
    Brenda Lee recently posted..Gift Ideas for Drink Lovers and EnthusiastsMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 28, 2015 at 4:14 pm #

      Hi Bren,

      Well you of all people would resonate with this. Zue Zue is new to your pack and tone is the answer! When I bring in a new dog, it is all about the tone otherwise, they will just run you to the ground lol.

      You sure do communicate well from your blog to online social sites. Your personality shines through all the time.

      I always enjoy seeing pictures of Titan and now Zue Zue. I think that is what had attracted me to follow you. We both have one thing in common….our fur babies.

      You communicate not only in words, but with pictures that always lift my heart.

      -Donna
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  8. Renard Moreau
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 2:55 pm #

    [ Laughs ] I related well to what you wrote about your dog.

    My dog also knows when I am serious by the tone of my voice (And, she usually gets away with figurative murder).

    Yes, I do believe that it is the same way with people.

    Your tone of voice along with the congruent body language will let others know where you stand and what it is that you stand for.
    Renard Moreau recently posted..The Issue Of Posting DailyMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 28, 2015 at 4:16 pm #

      Hi Renard.

      He He…so you must be like my husband with your dog. Tone and body language say a lot not only to our pets, but to people.

      Expressing ourselves whenever we are communicating is an important factor to be self aware of. You are always communicating in a kind way. :)

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  9. Mark
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 5:26 pm #

    Excellent post Donna!

    And so true! I can just see your dog loving staring up at David
    with those big and loving puppy dog eyes!LOL!

    And basically paying no attention to his verbal commands and
    simultaneously expecting to get fed!LOL!

    And I also love the way you subtly differentiate between your readers or visitors!

    That’s an incredibly subtle but extremely important distinction!Thanks so
    much for pointing that out!
    Mark recently posted..Why Savvy Entrepreneurs Would Never Ignore The Huge Potential Profit Buried In Their Vendors!My Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 29, 2015 at 11:28 am #

      Hi Mark,

      I liked using the dog example here to illustrate how our tone is so important with anything we do online. From our blogs to social media…we must have the awareness of how we deliver content.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  10. Dana
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 7:19 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    I love the fact that you can use a variety of methods to express something.

    Sometimes, a video clip can say what you want to say in an impactful way, through an individual you find inspiring. I’ve done this, but when I do I’ll throw in a blurb of my own expressing my perspective – sometimes in a sentence or two that sums up how I feel about it.

    I think it all goes back to authenticity. A sentence filled with truth and heart can speak volumes – whereas a lengthy article lacking in personality can be a dull and lifeless read.

    It’s so true that the way you express something reveals far more than the words themselves. Your example about your dog is perfect – as a dog only understand a command if a certain tone and action accompanies it.

    I feel that as long as we’re being true in whatever we’re looking to express, there are plenty of creative and imaginative ways to bring it to life.
    Dana recently posted..Some of My Favorite Quotes About ImaginationMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 29, 2015 at 11:33 am #

      Hi Dana,

      Indeed, sometimes a short video clip can shine the light on a particular message. It is about authenticity. People can see us face to face. Hear our tone of voice. – especially great if we are excited about something lol. And it does cause a reaction.

      We can also communicate with words too. But when you think of it, a little bit of YOU can go a long way.

      You sure summarized it wonderful when you mentioned that as long as we are being true in whatever we are looking to express, there are plenty of creative ways to bring it to life….Love that!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  11. Kurt Kummerer
    Twitter:
    September 28, 2015 at 8:45 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    My favorite method of communicating my message is through writing. I try to write in a way that is simple, so practically everyone can understand. I think exploring audio or podcasting might be in the cards some where down the line.

    I like your reasoning behind why you refer to those who come to your blog as “visitors”.

    I think another important thing to keep in mind when communicating is to use the same language as those you communicate with – I.e. if you read a blog post and it talks about customers use the word customers when communicating with the blog owner in the comments rather than using the word clients. Shows your listening and the blog owner will be able to relate better to you and vice versa. Goes hand-in-hand with how you say it.

    A little different than what Sherman mentioned in his comment.

    I’ll be sure to share on Twitter and Google+ Donna.

    Thanks for taking the time to write this post.

    Kurt
    Kurt Kummerer recently posted..3 Unconventional Ways Professional Bloggers Can Increase RevenueMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 29, 2015 at 11:38 am #

      Hi Kurt,

      I just love the way you communicate through writing. You give real life examples of your business to illustrate the point of the post. I find it so enjoyable to read each time I’ve visited you.

      True..if a blog post is using the word “customers” our reply has to use that word instead of “clients” and it shows we have listened to the message given.

      I like to keep things as simple as I can when doing a post. This way a message can be related quickly.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  12. Jane
    Twitter:
    September 29, 2015 at 12:06 am #

    Hey Donna,

    You’ve nailed it. Words mean a lot lesser when compared to how they are said. The tone, the presentation, the voice, the style etc. – all these matter a lot more than the words.

    And today, there can be so much variety in whatever we present and it is an advantage. We are not confined to writing text blog posts. Depending upon what we are good at and what we are comfortable with, we can choose to share in whatever way that chooses us.

    Creating an impact matters and it really depends on how we say things.

    Thanks for bringing out this powerful message Donna. Enjoy your week!

    Cheers,
    Jane.
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    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 12:15 pm #

      Hi Jane,

      Indeed, the tone, style, etc all have an impact of how our message is perceived. It comes out through our writing style, but more importantly, using video or podcasts can really convey a message to others in a different perspective.

      As long as we are comfortable with it, we need to keep improving. Even if we are not i.e. video presentations, we can get around the face to face by doing screen shares or just about anything else.

      Thanks so much for your input on this,

      -Donna
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  13. Akaahan Terungwa
    Twitter:
    September 29, 2015 at 1:23 am #

    Hi Donna,

    I so love the message of this post! And I’m testimony to the fact that it’s true – completely!

    Offline, many persons hold that I am always serious and carry a ‘grave’ look. It is also said that even my jokes sound like lessons in Nuclear Physics :)

    While I do not believe the above to be true, the effect on the persons who actually believe it is immense! As a result, I am taken more seriously than ALL my peers even when I’m obviously joking…

    Online, I have been told of the clarity in my writing and how it inspires – even when I write in a casual manner :) This has endeared me respect that has also meant a bigger wallet.

    Donna, you are spot on!

    Do enjoy the day!

    Always,
    Akaahan Terungwa
    Akaahan Terungwa recently posted..How To (Brilliantly) Tackle A False Scam Accusation OnlineMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 12:25 pm #

      Hi Akaahan,

      You sure do write very well and it only gains respect. That will gain monetization. As for your jokes, you remind me of my husband. He has what we call a “dry” sense of humor and very serious. But I never tire of them because they make me laugh.

      He could be in a crowded room, say a joke and I’m the only one that gets it lol. So keep your humor my friend! Keep it real as you always do.

      -Donna
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  14. Mi Muba
    Twitter:
    September 29, 2015 at 2:48 am #

    Hi Donna

    Very interesting post and idea is really mouth water as people do spend lot of time on what to say but never bother to brood how to say to make their saying unforgettable.

    Variety is the foundation stone for creating interest. Anything devoid of variety can be noticed by others if it is unique else people reject it outright because they already have gone through it earlier so why do they waste their time to go through it again. They are very right in approach.

    It is said that ideas are limited in this world. If they had unlimited there would have been a battle of ideas everywhere as we can see despite their limited numbers difference of opinion on every topic is so vocal and people love to disagree to learn more and teach more.

    So with limited ideas the best way to keep the interest of people intact is putting variety into oft-repeated ideas and for that purpose creating your own viewpoint and making your own voice heard by others is the best way to tell people there is not ending of an idea and it can be put into different ways for better results.

    Thanks a lot for sharing this very unique post with a lot of food for thought to create interesting contents.

    Have a great rest of the week

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 12:29 pm #

      Hi Mi,

      Thank you so much for your awesome input. We can create interest in many ways. I did this post with words. But I got on social media with different communications that are in align with this post.

      The idea of this one is how to communicate. So I did a video and put it on social media with a different title and no link to this post.

      I also created some images with quotes and put them out. The entire week, I will be communicating on this subject until my next post.

      There are so many ways to give one message out, and in doing so consistently, we can be more effective.

      -Donna
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  15. Shann Eva
    Twitter:
    September 29, 2015 at 4:05 pm #

    This is so true Donna! I find what I do best is when I tell personal stories on my blog, so that people can relate and see where I’m coming from. I tell it from my heart and with honesty, that’s not always happy or sunny. I’m working on other ways to get my messages across too. I’m not that great at photography, but I think I do better with video, so I’m going to work on doing more Periscopes and see if that works. Great post, and it gave me a lot to think about.
    Shann Eva recently posted..Twins’ Favorites TuesdayMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 12:32 pm #

      Hi Shann,

      Personal stories do have a major effect with others. A good story can get others to resonate to who you are and what you do.

      There are so many ways to get a message across. Periscope for me, is working very well so far. There is a whole different community I’m reaching out to and making great connections. Within the first week, I got asked to do a webinar, increased my opt-ins, but most of all became part of a great community with like minded marketers.

      That one video a day can be re-purposed in many ways.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  16. Kathryn Maclean
    Twitter:
    September 29, 2015 at 7:00 pm #

    Hi Donna,
    I didn’t quite get what you meant at first.
    But I got the idea….. Loved the little story about you and David and the dog.
    I quite understood, the same words to the dog, just differently understood by the dog. lol

    “it’s not what you say.” The way you present the topic is totally your own creation, in your words, with your own mood, insight or excitement. That comes across through “the way that you say it.”

    You gave me some ideas here, using a lot of pictures or a voice over on a video. These are
    different ways to be understood, than just the written text. Something to think about.

    Thanks for the excellent article, pic of the dog might have been nice. lol
    Kathryn Maclean recently posted..ArticlesMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 12:37 pm #

      Hi Kathryn,

      Glad you liked my dog story. It just illustrates how tone in our message can work. From writing to video to podcasting. Tone is something to think about.

      Indeed, you got it…the way we say it can relay our excitement or insight on any topic.

      I am happy you have some good ideas from this post. Yes pictures, or a voice over on a video can bring a lot of attention to you.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  17. Corina Ramos
    Twitter:
    September 29, 2015 at 7:29 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    I learned that saying when I was working in corporate America as a sale’s rep. Our pitch had to have a personal, friendly tone that flowed conversationally (is that a word? hehe)

    Anywho, I was one of those who thought we had to be a good writer in order to be a good blogger. In fact, my first blog posts were stuffy and monotone to say the least but I was going for a professional tone which I thought would make me come across as an expert in my field. Boy was I wrong.

    It wasn’t until I changed the tone of my blog posts that I started connecting with my visitors and making connections.

    I do believe in using a variety of tools to make content more engaging and interesting to read. Of course you know me and my issue with video but I’m making strides and staring off with tutorials to lend my voice instead of showing my face :).

    Thank you as always for writing such valuable posts! I hope you’re having a great day!

    Take care,
    Cori
    Corina Ramos recently posted..Find Great Deals on Amazon For Your Halloween PartyMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 12:49 pm #

      Hi Cori,

      Thank you so much for sharing your blogging journey and how you shifted from that stuffy monotone to a more personal touch that your readers found more interesting.

      You have raised a good issue here for those who need to find their own voice as you have. Just be yourself is my motto from writing to video.

      As content marketing is the new monetization, we have to be real out there. This is the only way we can stand out of such a huge crowd. And you have carved yourself a great niche my friend and do it so well.

      Oh those videos!!! He He He.. You can always do it with a screen share or use slide shares. Even on Periscope, I’m teaching camera shy folks how to jump on the band wagon if they are camera shy. I did one pointing at the ocean while speaking. I had 90 some odd people watching that one. I did put it up somewhere on my FB page I think.

      Just trying to inspire others how important video is these days!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  18. Connor Rickett
    Twitter:
    September 29, 2015 at 7:55 pm #

    Great article, Donna.

    I like what you’ve got to say. And, hey, changing how you say it is half the fun of being a writer to begin with. I’d encourage bloggers to branch out as much as possible. Not to the extent that they’re stretched too thin and snap like rubber bands of course (I think most of us have been there a time or two), but enough that their sphere of competence is constantly expanding.

    The only way to become a better speaker is to speak, and so on.

    Connor
    Connor Rickett recently posted..Narrated Stories: Coin Toss in a DinerMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 3, 2015 at 12:02 pm #

      Hi Connor,

      Welcome to my blog. Changing is half the fun of being a writer or any thing else for that matter. Yes, bloggers need to branch out as much as possible, but like you mention not to the extent that we could stretch too thin and snap like a rubber band.

      The only way to be a good speaker is to keep on speaking, and that goes for writing too.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  19. Hema Unnoop
    Twitter:
    September 29, 2015 at 10:13 pm #

    Hello Donna,

    Thoroughly enjoyed your post. I didn’t realize that the topic of this post was leading to something so important to all bloggers and whoever wants to get a message out there.

    I wish I read this when I first started blogging. But it’s never too late. I have been working on bringing variety to my post and now with the relaunch of my blog I am better prepared to communicate with my readers.

    Some of my posts have been disasters….but some had awesome traffic. When I tried to see the difference between the two…I realized that the manner in which I was conveying my message wasn’t consistent. The ones that had better traffic and connection were the ones where I was being human. Telling it like it is!

    People seem to gel with that kind of post better.

    Your post certainly is encouraging. As you advised me earlier (on fb) on making videos, I am working on it and hopefully I can publish my maiden video sometime soon.

    Thank you again for your valuable posts.

    Hema

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 12:53 pm #

      Hi Hema,

      No, it is never too late to bring variety to your blog. A blog is a journey and we grow with it. If we wait for everything to be perfect we would ever hit the “publish” button lol.

      Indeed, telling it like it is and being human brings more attention than anything. The traffic did increase for you while you were doing thi.

      Yes, people gel with that kind of post.

      I’m so happy that this encouraged you. Start with your videos asap!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  20. Sue Bride
    Twitter:
    September 30, 2015 at 1:13 am #

    Our cats respond to my finger – a pointed index finger which I used to accompany with the word “go” or “stop”. It doesn’t stop them doing what they know to be wrong if I’m not around.

    I won’t point fingers at my blog visitors of course, unless it’s by recognizing them in a post. I make a lot of use of images. Most of my visitors come from US and I’m not sure they’d easily understand my mixed Yorkshire UK/Australian accent on audio or video.

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 2:11 pm #

      Hi Sue,

      I wish my dogs were as good as your cats lol. I’m seeing how wonderful your images are on your blog.

      Never ever worry about an accent. We all come from different parts of the world, so don’t ever let that stop you. I’m here in the U.S. and have a Brooklyn accent. My friends down south have a Southern accent. Then there are so any people that speak English with Aussie accents I love, etc.

      Never let that stop you if you wanted to do a video or podcast. It only makes you more interesting.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  21. ikechi
    Twitter:
    September 30, 2015 at 2:58 am #

    Hi Donna

    Thanks for this post and you are so right. It really is not what you say but it is how you say it.

    Sometimes I am so bugged about what to say in my blog that It takes so much time to create a post. I want to say something that is unique and has not been said before.

    So you post came as a surprise but I realize that it is the way you say it that really matters and this gives me an opportunity to really be creative.

    Thanks for the awesome information. Have a great week.
    ikechi recently posted..How To Be Clingy, Have No Friends and Slowly Destroy Your EssenceMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 2:24 pm #

      H Ikechi,

      We don’t have to be master writers on our blog. What is really important is how we say it with our hearts. And you my dear friend always relay your unique content so well.

      The stories you tell have a great impact on our lives. You are helping people to “Be A Light To The World”

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  22. Dan Ewah
    Twitter:
    September 30, 2015 at 5:49 am #

    Hi Donna,

    What I learn from this post is that we need to be ourselves and to be ourselves, we need to work on our attitude.

    If someone with a negative attitude heeds the advice to be himself, guess what, he’ll still mess things up.

    But when we are able to communicate with our audience in a respectable and friendly manner, we would be able to build and forge that much sought after relationship much faster.

    Thanks Donna for this awesome post, I really enjoyed reading ti.

    Cheers.

    Dan
    Dan Ewah recently posted..14 Ways to Improve Website User Experience – INFOGRAPHICMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 2:34 pm #

      Hi Dan,

      Indeed, being ourselves is a Must! As we deliver content for our readers, we do have to keep things positive.

      True, if someone has a negative attitude he/she will mess it up. It only takes one time to turn people off so we do have to be mindful of what we communicate to others. Negativity only pushes people away.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  23. Enstine Muki
    Twitter:
    September 30, 2015 at 6:12 am #

    wow! The dog story 😉

    I love it because of my likeness for these pets though my wife is just the opposite. She doesn’t want to hear about it.

    You know I learned from Adrienne Smith that to be a good blogger, you have to flow and be yourself. You have to simply ‘discuss’

    Yeah, you confirmed it again in this post. You don’t need to be a good writer to write a letter to a brother. Just discuss. It makes your posts even more interesting to read 😉

    Awesome piece, Donna!

    I hope you are having an awesome week as you engage with us 😉
    Enstine Muki recently posted..5 Actionable Tips to Explode Blog Growth and Revenue + ExamplesMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 2:47 pm #

      Hi Enstine,

      Yep..a dog story only because I’m a dog person lol. It’s a good thing my husband and I are both dog people. We used to have 3 but are down to two boys. We are keeping our eyes open for a little girl to keep those boys in line.

      Now we don’t have to be a good writer to write blogs or anything else. We just have to keep things real. Be ourselves and deliver our unique message to others. That always wins!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  24. Chery Schmidt
    Twitter:
    September 30, 2015 at 10:12 am #

    Good Morning Donna, So Nope I don’t think I will ever be able to call myself a writer LOL But I do like to share my stories,

    I guess I never really thought about what my favorite method of communicating my message is?

    This was a weird question to me HEHE I guess I will have to think on this one,

    I do know that I have been opening up more and sharing more about me as well as with Pictures ( OF ME) Wow now talking about getting out of my comfort zone, HEHE I never in a million years would have thought I would be blogging and using pictures of ME for my images.

    I really enjoyed this post, OH YEH It’s not what you say but the way that you say it.
    Thanks for sharing
    Chery :))
    Chery Schmidt recently posted..Attention Baby Boomers Time To Secure Your Financial FutureMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      September 30, 2015 at 2:54 pm #

      Hi Chery,

      You ARE a writer because you have been blogging for a long time. As for your pictures…I love them. I find it the best way you are branding yourself on your blog as well as social sites.

      I do know how you feel about that because I wouldn’t have thought I would be doing videos every day and putting them all over the place.

      But we all have to do what we have to do in order to communicate in our own unique way!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  25. Merle Gibbins
    Twitter:
    September 30, 2015 at 4:00 pm #

    Hi Donna, when I read your header title a song came to mind but it was slightly different to your header. It was “it’s not what you do, it’s the way that you do it”. I really enjoyed reading this post and at the moment I stick mainly to blogging but know I must get stuck into video and will be checking out Periscope some time this week. Thanks for sharing.
    Merle Gibbins recently posted..Website Branding and its ImportanceMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 3, 2015 at 12:10 pm #

      Hi Merle,

      Yes it is an old song and it stuck in my mind from my college professor who always grilled us when we were roll playing.

      As bloggers, we can always stretch into new ways to enhance our blog and our marketing. Video is a great way to do so. Especially when we download it to Youtube, create a Youtube card which can be linked to a blog post or anything else for that matter.

      Good to know your interest in Periscope. It has been serving me well and I’m sure it will be great for you too.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  26. Shamsudeen
    Twitter:
    September 30, 2015 at 8:21 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    I do use “readers”, “visitors” and sometimes, commenters…….it depends on the message I want to drive home and exactly who am talking to at that moment.

    Readers are mostly to me, those who consume my content on regular basis for either pleasure, education or just to associate with the blog.

    These set of audience do not leave comment on the post they read, and if they do maybe just once in a while.

    But I have those set of audience that no matter what you I put out there, they make sure their voice are heard. And if they do not say something, they make their presence felt by sharing.

    While visitors are basically one-time visitors that just need to find solution/information to that present need. Mostly, these sets of audience are from search and paid traffic.

    They know exactly what they’re looking for and are just here to get it – nothing more.

    This line in the post really caught my attention;

    “You see, so many people try to create a blog or an article about something “new” that nobody’s ever heard of.

    Unless you’re posting about a new software or a movie in production, you’re not likely to be the first person to ever blog about whatever you want to blog about”.

    When I got started with blogging and read almost on every blog I visited that I need fresh UNIQUE content to stand out from the crowd. My understand of this phrase was that I have to say something no one else ever said.

    I attempt to achieve that, but the more I tried…..the more I found out nothing like that.

    Almost everything has been said, we only need to be unique by presenting same wine in a new bottle.

    Thanks Donna, nice reading.
    Shamsudeen recently posted..StudioPress Author Theme Pro ReviewMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 3, 2015 at 12:56 pm #

      Hi Shamsudeen,

      When we hear about “unique content” it only means that we can write about something in our “own voice” Indeed, everything out there as been said a million times. But what helps us stand out as unique individuals, is our own personality.

      If a million people write about “how to blog” for instance, and we want to write that too, it will be unique because we are writing it in our own words, our own context and our unique vision of it.

      So how do we stand out you may ask? By being consistent. By visiting other bloggers, commenting and sharing on social media. It starts growing your own “followers” and they will reciprocate and come to your blog.

      We cannot reach everyone, but a small percent out there in internet land and there is plenty to go around.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  27. Tom Southern
    Twitter:
    October 1, 2015 at 3:30 am #

    Hi Donna,

    Love your story of your little dog. He’s certainly a clever chap.

    I like your way of calling people who come to your blog visitors. I can see that it gives you the incentive to treat them differently because they may not stay. Calling them readers can give bloggers the feeling that they done the hard job of winning their attention and convincing them to stay, so you don’t need to work so hard. This could be a problem because it could lead you into not keeping up your hard work of continually giving value, giving excellent return on their investment.

    I often call people visiting my blog “audience”. I suppose the idea is that I’m “performing”, therefore I need to keep them hooked or else risk losing their attention. You’re right too about the limitations calling yourself a writer as supposed to a blogger.

    I think sometimes, bloggers think “writer” sounds better. Not always. It depends on your message and what you’re offering people. There are a lot of writers who blog to increase leaders for their books.

    In the end, it all comes down to knowing how to add value via your creativity.

    For me, writing content is what I’m good at and, while I learn the art of doing videos and other media, writing is what keeps me giving value.

    Excellent points to think on here, Donna, thanks.

    -Tom
    Tom Southern recently posted..Blogging Tips, Strategies And Tactics: How To Sort Through The Pile and Find The One That’ll (Actually) Work For YouMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 3, 2015 at 1:01 pm #

      Hi Tom,

      I like the way you view your blog as “audience” because you have to keep up your performance. Fantastic way to think about it.

      We all have to keep people’s attention and write to them…yes like preforming. That is great incentive!

      No matter what we call them, these are real people who will want to come back to our blogs over and over again because they are interested in us. Our unique message we share and the value we give to others

      As long as we have that in our mindset, I do believe we get better and better at it. Writing, video, podcasting…whatever. It is all in the way we communicate. As long as we communicate to others, people will see our value.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  28. Andrew
    Twitter:
    October 1, 2015 at 7:05 pm #

    Hey Donna,

    Really great post here.

    Interestingly enough, I’ve always wanted to be a writer. Writing short stories and novels. But never thought I would have that opportunity. Then here comes blogging as a solution. I think because we blog, we’re all writers to a degree.

    But, like you said, there’s a lot of different ways to blog … even if you’re “not” a writer. I like the other examples you explained. Interestingly enough, those other suggestions would work well. I’ve seen many people do vlogs and stuff like that.

    Lastly, it is all about how you say it and not what you say. You’re 100% right there.

    – Andrew
    Andrew recently posted..Reader Discussion: What Do You Blog About?My Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 3, 2015 at 1:05 pm #

      Hi Andrew,

      Looks like your dream came true. You always wanted to be a writer and you are now because of your blog. We are all writers in one form or another when we are writing our blog posts. The more we do, the better we get.

      I do like video because I can say so much in such a short time. Saves my fingers work lol.

      Communication is key no mater what we choose. Communicating wisely is best of all. I have to say, I have been reading your last post “Reader Discussion” and it is brilliant! Everyone seems to be having so much fun there.

      That’s what I call good engagement!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  29. Ryan Biddulph
    Twitter:
    October 1, 2015 at 7:44 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    I totally vibe with this message because how you say things is directly related to your vibe, and we live in a Universe of energy. The free folks have a fabulous, energetic delivery through whichever medium they choose. The struggling bloggers are generally concerned with sharing certain successful tips but their delivery lacks authenticity and personality.

    I for one love to ham things up just a little bit. I’m adding more flair to my eBooks and podcasts and to my videos too. Even more cool? I am chilling in Nicaragua now. Yep, Kelli and I just arrived a few hours ago, as this is the next stop on the Blogging from Paradise tour.

    I can’t help but to add more flavor to how I say things because we’re living in the middle of the neatest little Nicaraguan town, with wildly colorful buildings, horses pulling buggies down the street and all types of stuff I had not seen up close and personal before. It’s funky. Really funky. And it vibes totally with the direction I continue to move in.

    If you’ll go out on a limb and deliver your content in your special, authentic voice you can’t help but to make a tremendous impact on your audience. Get clear. Be brave. I am pulling back on podcasts because I have like over 70 to start promoting – AFTER i dive into my eBook promoting campaign – but when I do record 1 or 2 goodness knows I’ll be super aware of how I’m speaking my message.

    Those who know why have little problems with how they convey their message.

    Super advice Donna.

    Ryan
    Ryan Biddulph recently posted..Download 7 eBooks for $6.93My Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 3, 2015 at 1:14 pm #

      Hi Ryan,

      So now you and Kelli are in Nicaragua! Beats New Jersey hugh? lol Good to know you are globe trotting again after a short break.

      I know you use so many parts to the whole when communicating. Your blogs are like adventure stories for me sometimes. Then you have all your ebooks, and run specials on them from time to time. Not to mention the podcasts!

      I do love your videos because it shows so much enthusiasm words cannot express. You are so happy and upbeat. This is why I love to use them from time to time in my blog. But I’ve been doing a video a day for the past 3 weeks.

      Since I’ve been on Periscope, It has been amazing how I’ve reached so may people beyond blogging and marketing. It’s wild and so effective when it comes to people that follow and eve opt in to something I offer.

      There are so many ways to communicate but you my friend have just about covered all of them Keep on going!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  30. Kore Duke
    Twitter:
    October 2, 2015 at 6:35 pm #

    Hi Donna

    Yes, its really not what you say but how you say it that matters. I’ve learnt from your post that we have to be unique in our writing and not try every single time to make our writing perfect but we should make sure we are able to communicate effectively to our visitors.

    Variety can add a little spice to our blog so making a video or audio post can do some magic for us.

    Most of the post we write about ain’t new but what makes them unique is the way we say it even if it means the same thing as the others and we can also improve on them by making videos or audios.

    I love how you differentiated visitors from readers.
    I never really thought of any difference between them.

    Thanks for sharing this wonderful post.

    Have a great day.
    Kore Duke recently posted..12 Simple but Effective Ways to Overcome Writer’s BlockMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 4, 2015 at 11:55 am #

      Hi Kore,

      Exactly, it’s really how you say it. As unique individuals we all have a unique way of communicating to others.

      I like your idea of a mix. I do that too because you never know who will resonate with what. It keeps things fresh and alive!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  31. Kim Willis
    Twitter:
    October 3, 2015 at 11:20 am #

    Great topic Donna!

    It’s not the words, but the MUSIC in the words, that makes the difference. That’s why you can train a couple of people in sales, give them the exact same words to use – one will nail it, but the other won’t.

    Same words but different ‘music’. Like night and day.

    Everything you say is spot on. Even with the written word one blogger can write about a topic and not really move and inspire people, whilst someone else can use similar words and somehow really ‘connects’ with their audience.

    As others have said, including Ryan Biddulph, we all have to find our authentic self. Then we can write from the heart – people pick up on that!

    Thanks Donna – fab!

    Kim
    Kim Willis recently posted..Expand Your Vision and Explode Your IncomeMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 4, 2015 at 12:09 pm #

      Hi Kim,

      I like that phrase…it’s not the words, but the MUSIC in the words. So true. When it gets down to it all, it is our “authentic” self that brings a message alive.

      Some will resonate with it, some will not. It doesn’t matter in the end because there will always be those that will resonate with us. Then monetization will follow.

      When things come from the heart, people have a funny way of knowing that.

      -Donna
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  32. Monna Ellithorpe
    Twitter:
    October 3, 2015 at 3:42 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    Such a good post. It is very important that we watch how we write. I sometimes have a problem with trying to explain something and have to rewrite a few times.

    The written word does not come out with the expressions that you can when you speak to someone directly.

    I must stop calling visitors, readers. You are right, there are so many different ways to communicate with your visitors.

    Thanks for a great post.
    Monna Ellithorpe recently posted..There Is A Fine Line Between Writing and MarketingMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 4, 2015 at 12:15 pm #

      Hi Monna,

      As a writer, you are amazing when you put out a post. You know how to use words effectively and always are authentic. Your caring personality shines through everywhere you write.

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  33. Joan Harrington
    Twitter:
    October 3, 2015 at 3:53 pm #

    Hi Donna :)

    Really enjoyed your post! Got me thinking lol thank you for that! It is all about the way you present your words….especially as a blogger. I know for me when I am writing a blog post, I think about not only the words I am writing but what they mean to my readers :) So I totally get your post, thank you!
    Joan Harrington recently posted..Does Your Content Get Enough Shares On Social Media?My Profile

  34. Linda Schrier
    Twitter:
    October 3, 2015 at 4:58 pm #

    Hi Donna,

    “It’s Not What You Say But The Way That You Say It” is so true to life. Loved your pets story. It made your story stand out. It gave it personality. Your pets know whose boss.

    Your videos are great and I loved your course “Blogging Magic”. After taking that course, everything changed for me for the better. I haven’t heard you on a podcast but believe I will. We can’t limit ourselves.

    You gave us a lot of great ideas on how to better ourselves as bloggers and I thank you for that. As long as we are true to ourselves, everything falls into place for our visitors. We must use the golden rule in our blogging journey as that is all about how we say it.

    Thank you for a terrific message, Donna and you have a wonderful weekend.

    Linda
    Linda Schrier recently posted..Top 10 Content Marketing StrategiesMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 4, 2015 at 12:24 pm #

      Hi Linda,

      How wonderful to know that after taking my “Blogging Magic” course things have changed for you.

      Indeed, as long as we are ourselves and deliver our content with authenticity, we cannot go wrong. Yes, everything does fall into place for our visitors.

      I have seen you come a long way Linda and I’m so happy for you!

      -Donna
      Donna Merrill recently posted..Sell Affiliate Products On Your BlogMy Profile

  35. Brent Jones
    Twitter:
    October 3, 2015 at 6:37 pm #

    Hey Donna — have you ever read ‘The Likeability Factor’ by Tim Sanders?

    I think you’d really enjoy it. :-)

    It’s about this very issue — that how ‘likeable’ we appear to others ultimately influences the relationships we build, our credibility, our trustworthiness… in almost every area of our lives, how people perceive our words and actions is more important than the words and actions themselves.

    Great post — sharing!

    Best,

    Brent
    Brent Jones recently posted..Publish Your Writing with Don EastonMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 4, 2015 at 12:28 pm #

      Hi Brent,

      I haven’t read that book yet but did hear about it. It is so true …how people perceive our words and actions is so important than the words and actions themselves.

      We all have different perceptions from our own bias.

      When we are out blogging and speaking it is all about our authenticity and ethics. Put those two together and it will create a likability. But not for everyone…We are all different and resonate with different people. As long as that is in our mindset we are good to go.

      -Donna
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  36. Erika Mohssen-Beyk
    Twitter:
    October 3, 2015 at 11:21 pm #

    Hi Donna,
    your dog story reminds me on my animals,
    for them it is not words ,they feel and get it like
    telepathy what we say or want ,they feel if we are serious
    with what me say or not . I speak to my animals in different
    language and most in a sound language ,which one of my
    guests asked me what is this ? :) A language only made of
    sound not of words :) I had even a guest ,last summer ,we
    did not know each others language and I sent him after his
    dream,he was so enthusiastic about ,that he left a day earlier
    to get to a place I sent him . Later thinking how this worked ,I can
    not tell you :)
    But writing a post is different ,it is for more people and I do not
    have enough words sometimes ,but I often use quotes to say
    what I want to say. You are right ,there are many ways to
    communicate and we can get creative .
    Thank you for this interesting post .
    Erika
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    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 4, 2015 at 12:31 pm #

      Hi Erika,

      I love your share about how you communicate with your animals. I can just picture it in my mind. Yes, they are very intuitive…more than people lol.

      Writing a blog post we can use quotes and so many other things to get the message across to others. I always enjoy visiting your blog. It is a “feel good” one.

      -Donna
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  37. Lesly Federici
    Twitter:
    October 4, 2015 at 8:32 am #

    Hey Donna,
    I like the way you weaved in a variety of ways to communicate inspired by your story. So exciting these days the variety of tools available to us. You just have to find which one you like the most – but having a variety of ways is good and builds your audience. Great suggestions .. love it.
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    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 4, 2015 at 12:44 pm #

      Hi Lesly,

      Yes there are so many tools out there to communicate with. It can make your head spin. So we have to pick a few and go with it. Otherwise we will get overwhelmed.

      I like variety available to me. The more I learn, the better I get at it. :)

      -Donna
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  38. Mary Sloane
    Twitter:
    October 4, 2015 at 11:02 am #

    Great article Donna

    I just read an article about perceptions and I think it is really apt as the things we a say and how we say it has everything to do with perceptions. If your belief is that dogs belong on the floor and should not be fed lap treats for all the right reasons than when you say “Get Down” the dog hears Get Down.

    But if David says Get Down and his belief and perception is that cute little dogs are lap dogs then when he says “Get Down” the dog hears “I love you where you are”

    Animals are much more attuned to the thought waves than we are.

    Their perception is that they should do whatever pleases you because they get the Zig Ziglar quote: :If you help enough people get what they want, you’ll never want!”

    So they don’t worry about anything other than pleasing you and turst it will get them what they want and they’re right a lot of the time LOL!
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    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 4, 2015 at 12:50 pm #

      Hi Mary,

      Exactly…its all about perception. There is a difference with our dog example. I’m a true believer that animals are more intuitive than people. Sometimes I just look into my dog’s eyes and think “come” and he comes to me.

      Aha thank you for that wonderful quote by Zig Ziglar to add flavor to this post.

      -Donna
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  39. Deborah A. Ten Brink
    Twitter:
    October 4, 2015 at 7:27 pm #

    Hello Donna!

    Another great post! I think my main take-away is how to communicate in our own natural way. When I think to real-world business, some people are good with a face-to-face approach (which online transfers to video really well), some are good on the phone (which means they’d probably do well with audio or podcasts), while others may do better with images (like a slideshow or PowerPoint presentation), and others are better with the written word.

    As you say, blogging is a platform for any of these types of communication. I really picked up on your word “readers.” I never thought about it that way, but now that you have mentioned it, you are right! Some blogs I visit see it that way. I, too, have always thought of them as “visitors,” like inviting a friend over for a chat or discussion.

    You always make me think outside the box. :)

    Debroah
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    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 11, 2015 at 1:30 pm #

      Hi Deborah,

      Glad I made you “think outside the box” lol There are so many ways to communicate like you mentioned above that we can reach our readers in a broader aspect. If we are good writers…go with it, but sometimes challenge yourself to do a video or podcast.

      Blending different ways of communicating is a great way to get attention from many readers.

      -Donna
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  40. Dr. Elise Cohen Ho
    Twitter:
    October 4, 2015 at 7:33 pm #

    You are so correct. How we communicate with people is so very important. How we say things means so much mor ethan what we say. You can say the most kind words but if they come out venomous they are not kind at all. We must think before we speak.
    Dr. Elise Cohen Ho recently posted..Product Review: Living Intentions Wild Berry Trail MixMy Profile

  41. Susan cooper
    Twitter:
    October 5, 2015 at 6:12 pm #

    Hi Donna. Great point and good post. I particularly love the comparison to our pets and tone of voice. It makes all the difference in the world. I know or cat Samuel knows he is my big baby. Even if I try to sound stern when telling him to get down or off something, here, he picks up on the slightest kindness in my voice and didn’t listen. They always seem to respond better to a male deeper voice.
    Now I know being dyslexic I am not a perfect writer, that’s where my editors come in. But I can tell a story or describe the food or wine I’m covering just fine. It does take a while to find your voice and get over that fear that it has to be perfect or sound like it’s written by am expert. But I think people enjoy getting to know the real you. :)
    Susan cooper recently posted..Homemade Strawberry Ice Cream: #RecipeMy Profile

    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 11, 2015 at 1:34 pm #

      Hi Susan,

      You bring out a great point. People do need to hear and see the real person. If we are too professional, they may misinterpret what we are trying to say.

      Real is how we always need to be. This is what “attraction marketing” is all about.

      -Donna
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  42. Atish Ranjan October 7, 2015 at 9:10 am #

    Hi Donna,

    I completely agree with you. When I used to teach kids few years ago, I used to scold them with soft voice and they didn’t get me so serious ever. As I have been a soft-hearted person.

    You tone and facial expressions make a big difference when you something. I liked the way you have produced the example of you, your dog, and David. Everyone, even pets understand when you are serious and when not just by sensing by your tone.

    PS: I have been busy offline so was not coming online properly. Glad that I am back. This article is refreshing one.
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    • Donna Merrill
      Twitter:
      October 11, 2015 at 1:36 pm #

      Hi Atish,

      Glad to see you back online. Yes, it is all about the tone we use. When it comes to communicating to others in a social setting, we tend to have a happy tone (I hope lol)

      When we are talking business, we can hear ourselves using a different tone. But in today’s world, business must be a friendly handshake and we do need that softness.

      -Donna
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